Lemmy: Killed By Death

Lemmy is dead. Cant quite believe I had to type that. Ian Kilmister seemed indestructible, the Keef Richards of heavy metal if you like (although the man himself didn't think Motorhead were geavy metal). Ageing gods like Lemmy, Ozzy, Rob Halford don't die, they can't, its not part of the plan. Or this is what I had always believed in my 35 years as a metalhead before last nights news smacked me around the head.
Crazy as it sounds (and this is something else I can't believe im typing) I wasn't much into Motorhead, in the beginning, preferring instead Iron Maiden, Saxon and Judas Priest. There is room for all of course but the younger me wouldn't have it and snobbishly I always looked down on Lemmy's crew. I loved Ace of Spades and Killed By Death but there my appreciation ended. Luckily it didn't last and when I finally succumbed to the iron fist, I went to HMV and hoovered up every Motorhead album they had. Ah those wasted years, but I put it right in the end.

No more Motorhead. Funnily enough, half an hour before the sad news broke, I was listening to the older records, so one might say that I was with Lemmy when he passed.

No more Motorhead. I can't believe it.

*This is just a quick post, I will tidy it up when im less stunned. The music is all that matters anyway.

Sean Penn: Holywood's Dangerous Angel

First off, I know some people think its somehow "cool" to dislike Sean Penn (which is fine, people with something to say and aren't shy about saying it generally do come under some heavy fire) but I have a confession: I like the guy. And always have ever since seeing him in 1988's Bad Boys movie.
I will probably get a few negatives from my fellow Brits by admitting this (he rubbed more than a few up the wrong way after what he said about the Falkland Islands but hey ho, we have free speech yes?) but as a force for creativity goes, Penn is quite...awesome and excuse me while I blow my own trumpet but the "Dangerous Angel" in my title took no thought, came in an instant and suits the actor perfectly. I'm not a big film fan these days (poetry and videogames have a bigger place in my heart) but if I see Sean Penn's name in the credits, its an easier sell for me.
The man is a walking stick of TnT, oozing with charisma and I adore that danger which plays around his eyes. The silver screen does more than fairly crackle when he gets his acting chops on. British actors have always been rightly celebrated with giants like Sir Lawrence Olivier, Richard Burton, Peter O'Toole and Richard Harris but its always bugged me when some folk think American actors are less good. Perhaps today they are, like I said, I don't watch much movies these days, but Pacino, De Niro, Eastwood, Freeman and damn it yes Sean Penn? That's some heavyweight clout right there.
A local journalist once asked me which actor I would choose to recite my poetry. Obviously my first choice being Welsh was Richard Burton but when she said, I had to choose a living actor I could tell my reply surprised her a tad. "Sean Penn>?" She asked checking to see if she'd heard right. "Sean f**king Penn" I said, the F word used to emphasise how highly I rate his talent if that makes sense.

And the sad thing is? From the few movies I have watched recently featuring what the tabloids call, "hot young actors", I don't see a Burton or Penn in sight.

Welshman and the Great Escape

Brave: Great Escape

We have all seen the movie, The Great Escape, and cheered on Steve McQueen's character Hilts as he attempts to sail over barbed wire on a motorbike at the end (though that bit was Hollywood fiction). Certainly I was not alone in feeling a wave of claustrophobia wash over me during the tunnel scenes, as these courageous prisoners of war tunnelled their way to freedom? And who could forget the Gestapo gunning down 50 of the escapees after being told to get out of the truck to "stretch their legs" while on their way back to camp (or so they thought)?
The Great Escape has many memorable scenes and though not all based on fact, helped make it a classic. (It is easily one of Mr Jakes' favourite films). Of course the main story IS very much true and took place 70 years ago on this very day. Of those who broke out, only three reached safety, 73 were recaptured, and 50 shot. Such heroic souls! No finer example of fire in the human spirit, and may they all rest in peace.
In the photograph above, the reader can see Cyncoed~born Brian Evans (left) a Welshman who was part of this historic escape. Sadly Mr Evans was one of those men murdered by Gestapo but it fills me with pride that one of my countrymen is a figure in this glorious tapestry.

Nationalities of the 50 executed prisoners

21 British
6 Canadian
6 Polish
5 Australian
3 South African
2 New Zealanders
2 Norwegian
1 Belgian
1 Czechoslovak
1 Frenchman
1 Greek
1 Lithuanian

Making Me Loaf

The Prime Minister has come under fire after struggling on radio (an interview I heard myself on LBC) to name the price of budget supermarket bread. David Cameron replied: "But you can buy a loaf in a supermarket for well north of £1." And revealed that he preferred to bake his own bread (plugging a local Cotswold flour as he did so).
You cn guess what happened next right? Within an hour of finishing the interview, newspaper were carrying the story online and readers were filling the comments area below with cries of how out of touch with 'real people' the British PM really was. The clueless, rich oaf! The uncaring toff!Why he knows nothing about the daily struggle of hardworking people, the normal man on the street. Pah! *Rummages for pitchforks*
Do people seriously expect a man who works full time, you know, running the country, with very little time to himself, to know the exact cost of a loaf? Do folk really think that the Prime Minister of Great Britain does the weekly shop down his local Morrisons? Stunning ignorance if you do. Must think being a world leader is no different than working any other job. Perhaps Barack Obama hits his local Blockbuster with the kids on a Friday to rent the weekend movie? (I realise Netflix is King these days but you get my point).
Only the lazy thinking and pedantic would honestly believe that men with such important jobs think this way. Maybe because they have too much time on their hands? Im not Cameron's biggest fan (far from it) but feel someone needs to show some support. I don't know the price of everything in the supermarkets, I simply throw whatever it is that takes my fancy on that particular week into my trolley and head to the checkout. I love sliced beef, fresh from the local butchers, but couldn't tell you the price for toffee because I have more important things to keep in my head. So come on! Its a tad harsh to be putting our PM against the wall for this trivial nonsense. Oh and lastly, do remember that Cameron is a man. Shopping lists are not much of our thing.

A Small Taste of Pot

Sweet leaf?

Ageing stoners can sing the praises of cannabis until the cows come home, even sheep and horses but look at the people it attracts (taken from an article in todays Mail on Sunday):

"I meet an Albanian hash baron, through a British gangster. He warns me in advance that Ivan is ‘a right nutter’ before adding: ‘They are the maddest, baddest people I’ve ever met. Step out of line and they murder you."

So, even if the miserable stuff is safe (which its most certainly not) it still has the lethal potential to create victims purely because of the shady nature of its business and the hoodlums it attracts. And if you make it legal, it will still attract these vicious types because to some it is all they know and they will seek to undercut legitimate sellers. Face it, this is world that contains some very dodgy characters indeed, regardless what harm you think cannabis does or does not do. A place where killing and skullduggery are all too common, and as ive said, this creates innocent victims as well as those who some might say deserve it.
All because a few wretchedly selfish pot smokers want to fry their minds.

*And yes I am a frequent drinker of alcohol but im not so naïve to think its harmless if abused.

Cry Me A Rivers

Joan was unavailable for photos

So Joan Rivers appeared on David Letterman’s show and called cockney songbird Adele "fat". She joked: “What is her song? Rolling In The Deep? She should add Fried Chicken.” And our tabloids have rushed to Adele's defence like the guardians of morality they surely are *cough*
Excuse me but have they forgotten that Joan is a comedian? And besides having a pop at others, she isn't afraid to include herself in the pee~taking, in fact she routinely pokes fun at herself so it isn't like she's afraid to taste her own medicine. Let's not forget, Britain has birthed its fair share of near-the-knuckle comics from Monty Python to Bernard Manning. Go seek out out an early Manning show (probably on Youtube) and see for thyself, but be warned, make sure theres no ethnic minorities or even the elderly nearby.
I will be the first to admit that Joan was bang out of order with the Holocaust/Klum remark, that was totally wrong but her comments toward Adele were in my opinion pretty tame and although I can't speak for Adele, if it was me they were aimed at then I wouldn't have a problem. (And im sure the singer feels the same, afterall she's a Brit like me, we have thick skins and take the mickey out of each all the time.) Being called fat? No drama.
Folks ought to know by now that Ms Rivers has an acerbic wit and most annoying is the fact that Americans have nobody who is able to stand up to her with razor sharp repartee. Imagine a scenario of Joan and Sir Winston Churchill together onstage? That would be awesome to behold! Remember the exchanges between Sir Winnie and Lady Nancy Astor? Google them if you don't and you will see what I mean.

By the way I can't believe Joan was born in 1931. She looks fabulous for 79! Yes yes, we are all aware she has had cosmetic surgery but seriously, it doesn't bother me a jot. I think she looks stunning. In fact having just been browsing photos of her in younger days, Id say she looks better today. Good for Joan, and I for one applaud her sense of humour.

Oh Reign of Rains, Rain Our Reign!

Mr Jakes is in the middle

So far, so rain. Here we are halfway through July and summer 2012 is rapidly turning into a damp squib (emphasis on 'damp'). Britain of course isn't reknowned for champagne sunshine and vanilla whipped beaches but I do recall it being better than this. Roll back the dead days (1987/8 spring immediately to mind) and we have in fact experienced some fabulous summer months. For instance when I was in school, I don't remember having any truly awful weather during summer holidays. I remember shading under trees, discarding blazers and cooling off with ice but there was hardly ever (if at all) parka coats from June to September. Did I live in a parallel universe? Am I hoisting a Texan sun over my rose tinted spectacles? Not at all! Summers were alive and burning in my youth and I still remember the blaze on my sandy flesh. I can stll feel the sting of sunburn and saltwater from too many hours spent on Burry Port and Cefn Sidan beaches, and the hard parched gardens on which cricket and tennis were played. It was glorious, I remember it all so well.
Fastforward to 2012 however and things are not quite the same. We have not yet had back to back sunny days during this July and if any teenagers happen to read this they'll probably not believe the paradise I described in opening this post. All they can see if rain and heavy fog. The only sunshine they are likely to see is if they hop on a plane abroad because it seems the sun don't call on Britain anymore. (And I can't say I blame it either.)
Climate change? Planets shifted their mighty seats? Too much Facebook? Who knows what has happened but happened it has and it looks likely to not be reverting back anytime soon, so you'd better get used to those wellingtons and brollys. Personally Dai Jakes loves it! For one I don't have to see peoples withered and crooked toes, pointing out from flimsy sandals as they slap along busy promenades, hunting down half melted ice cream. I abhor sandals! As I have said elsewhere, this tyoe of footwear has the ability to make even the most beautiful woman look plain. (And im being kind there.) Also the cheap looking 'tramp stamps' (tattoos on young girls lower backs) are kept hidden when the weather is miserable and surely most sensible folk would be happy with this small mercy. Sexy? I beg to differ madam, you must have swallowed too many 'happy pills' on your way to the ink seat.
So a mixed post then today. Yes I did enjoy basking in the sand caked years of times now lost forever, but not being a particular great fan of the sun I am not sad to see things change. Especially when such ugly little habits appear whenever the sun does decide to its overgrown yellow chops.

Federer Rogers Murray

New Wimbledon tents available at all good camping stores soon!

Andy Murray is the first Briton in 74 years to reach a Wimbledon final and Britain expected much of him. He didn't disappoint either even if ultimately losing. He started the game with racket blazing, winning the first set despite all the naysayers pointing out he'd never won a set in his three other Grand Slam appearances. Balls to them then. Such was his play that I thought he was going to walk it, even against the supremely talented Roger Federer.
For once it looked good for British sport and the audience in center court were buzzing (including the obligatory celebrities like David Beckham but never his wife of course).
Federer won the second set with some magnificent shots but the rain interupted set three and the roof was pulled over the court making it look like a giant hermit crab. By this time Murray was probably happy for the break, anythig to stop the Swiss tennis maestro getting into his stride. When a champion loses the first set, its best go up a gear to prove who the real champion is and Federer showed touches of genius throughout this match.
We all knew in our heads that Murray would more than likely lose but it was exciting to follow the heart for a while. The Fed Machine went into overdrive in set four and the cake was his for the eating. There is no shame in losing to a master of the sport. Andy Murray can and should be proud of today, he'll win a Slam one day judging on this performance. Well done Andy, well done Roger.

** By the way the BBC have fine tennis champions on the commentary team with Boris Becker and John McEnroe so why they go and spoil it by including the weedy Tim Henman is a mystery to me. He's won nothing of any real significance and stands out like a banana amongst a box of cucumbers.

How To Kill A Film

Withnail's reaction

Most people will have seen the British comedy film Withnail & I (1986) which features Richard E. Grant and Paul McCann as boozy out of work actors. Its probably one of the most quoted movies of all time. And it is funny. Or it used to be. I made the mistake of watching it one too many times and now the film is dead for me. Not even Uncle Monty or a Camberwell carrot could help get a chortle out of my laugh box today. Very sad because it is a great film and if you haven't seen it, please check it out. It is hilarious. Sadly however, no longer so for me. *Unhappy Face*
Think i'll join Withnail in the zoo with a bottle wine.