Balls to the Sun

The sun! July! Sun spotted in Britain shocker! In a way I wish it was another post grumbling about the lack of sunshine here in Blighty because in a few weeks (probably days) this will be yesterdays fish & chip parcel but im here now so chip in with my two penn'orth. That's the beauty of teh interwebz, everyone can pile in from the grandest lion right down to the cheeky water vole stirred into life by the current hot gossip (or 'clecs' as we say here in Wales) ringing around the planet. Me? Im more honey badger myself but before Mr Jakes goes all Wind in the Willows I will jump to it with the grace of gazelle and...enough!
The Sun (tabloid newspaper and self appointed moral guardians) has defended its decision to share grainy footage of the Queen and Queen Mother being 'taught' the Nazi salute as a matter of 'historical significance'. Yeah, righto. I will take a punt here but the majority of sensible Brits can cut through the bullsh!t and see it for what it really is - a child doing something they don't understand the significance of. Her Majesty was seven years old for crying out loud! Remember, this was 1933, a good many years before Hitler revealed his true twisted intentions. Easy for us in 2015 and knowing the full horror to comment but the world in 1933 was a different place (apparently the mad führer was Time's 'Man of the Year').

Regular readers of my blogs will know by now that im no great lover of the monarchy, I wouldn't lose sleep if it was binned after the Queen's reign (I'd miss the pomp and ceremony of course). Its not fashionable these days to say it but Elizabeth II has done a sterling job, we've been fortunate here in Britain to have known her. Mark my words, she will be greatly missed when we begin the next chapter in the UK's rich history. Yes, she will.
Ah well, at least we'll get a few laughs from conspiracy theorists who will lap this story up like tramps on cheap cider. I can hear their blogs stirring into life even as I type this now. Jump to it, I could do with a giggle.

To Be Seen Is To Be Queen

Just brilliant!

What can I say? Eager was I to put a wordy bullet into the ceremonial body of the opening of London Games 2012, but after watching the show last night and on more than one instance of catching my jaw, I will have to keep my 'gun' in safe in its holster. It was spectacular!
This was a riot of a show perforated with ghostly reflections of the past and held together by the solemn girth of hymns and the proud pomp that only trumpets can produce.
I concede that director Danny Boyle did make some bits hard for those outside the UK to 'get' but presumably they understood the significance given to our literature/music and our contribution to the modern world through the industrial revolution through to the world wide web. Im also guessing they understood our world renowned quirky, self mocking sense of humour, and the acknowledgement that by and large we manage to be a people of tolerance and community.
Kudos must go to Her Majesty for her first 'acting' debut alongside 007 Daniel Craig (see above video) and that entrance was shall we say inspired. Very very cool. Who would ever have guessed it was the real Queen that had her back to Bond as he entered the room? Delightfully sporting of you Ma'am!
So a great ceremony all told (apart from Paul MacCartney but thats personal to me because I dislike his music) and I pity the organisers of the next Olympics in Rio in four years time.

Diamond Jubilee 2012

Time for an ale yet?

For the next four days Great Britain is celebrating Queen Elizabeth II 60 years reign, and being as this is only the second Diamond Jubilee in the United Kingdoms history it is a pretty historic event whatever your feelings on the Royal family.
"Gawd bless yer Ma'am!" Is what I imagine some over zealous cockneye is shouting from under a Union Jack flag and cap decorated with pin badges of the St George Cross and The Who. And good luck to them, I hope those celebrating have a good day and everything runs according to plan.
Dai Jakes however is not a big fan of the monarchy so instead of filling a blog with the usual photographs of regal pomp and ceremony (there are hundreds of other bloggers doing that) here there will be more 'man-on-the-street- type photos to show you all what it looks like in our towns, away from London and the glare and pizzazz of newsrooms and glossy magazines.


I love corgies. And Special Brew.

I flicked stations at halftime during the Wales v Barbarians rugby game (Wales won by the way) to see what sort of coverage the Diamond Jubilee was getting in the United States, and sure enough CNN have caught the bug too. So much so that the weather forecast for tomorrow was the top story. In case you are wondering dear reader, tomorrow is when a thousand ships and boats sail down the Thames with Her Majesty and Prince Philip on a throne on the main ship. Mr Jakes is looking forward to that. One thousand ships of all sizes. The mind doeth boggle.


It rains here. A lot.

But for now lets have some music from Johnny and chums! Apologies for the obvious choice but its still a great tune all these years on. And I was never a Sex Pistols fan when I first started listening to metal/punk. Ithought they were thick yobs with nothing to say or offer. God Save the Changes.


Rowdy louts or visionaries?


Patriotic tissue

This is interesting (albeit in a gory sort of way). Last saturday I cut myself shaving (not the famous beard, just experimenting with a bald top lip) and as everyone is aware I have a camera always at the ready like a photo obssessed Billy the Kid. Prepared for any ghost or alien that decides to pay a visit or in case of clumsy accidents like above.
It bled like a ripe tangerine and naturally I happily snapped away, hoping for a decent shot of a rich, crimson swab of pretty mulch that I could use in some post or other. Hey Presto! A week on and I have it. The colours fit: red, white and blue and its kinda heart shaped which denotes passion. More passion for Wales but you get the picture. And so did Mr Jakes.


Cool Brittania!


Pets At Home in Carmarthen

Even the animals in Pets At Home have the Jubilee bug, as you can see from the Union Jack above the guinea pig and rabbits enclosure.

Mr Jake's Gift To The Queen

Perfect for bathtime!

Prime Minister David 'Dai' Cameron has put the kybosh on taxpayers forking out £60m on a yacht as a gift for the Queen's Diamond Jubilee. But don't be too sad dear Majesty because we at the Dai Jake's Book offices have had a whip round with our dinner money and chosen to go hungry in order to get you a spiffy new yacht.
It comes complete with life vests, radio and binoculars and the upper deck is removable with a working anchor. The fancy cabin comes with a kitchen for the royal gin and furniture for the royal bum. Cool huh?
Just don't allow Andy to land any choppers on it, and don't take it too far out. Im certain you will be pleased with our efforts (and the fact that we now have to eat at Poundland) and any Knighthoods or OBE's kindly chucked our way will be gratefully received. Dai Jakes OBE has such a nice ring to it. Enjoy!

The Walrus Stole My Bicycle

Queen and The Beatles, two of the best known and most successful groups ever to have existed on this crusty old planet. Their combined albums would probably generate enough hit singles to actually power said crusty planet and their live performances are legendary (or so im told.) And yet for all of these successes and glories I am not, or ever have been, a fan.
In fact it goes a little deeper than simply disliking them, I thoroughly detest their music and not a tune I have heard convinces me otherwise. Actually thats wrong, there IS one track by Queen which I don't mind but can't for the life of me remember the title, such is the impact these two acts have on me.
I don't know why but I find the songs childish and listening to an entire album by The Beatles would be a torment for me. In all honesty I would rather suck blisters. In fact I know very little of their songs having never knowingly listened to them but what I have heard ive thought rubbish. And im not saying this to appear different or be a cool kid apart from the masses, I genuinely think the music to be juvenile and in some instances clutching at straws.
On the flip side I do regard Freddie Mercury as one of the best frontmen to have stepped on stage, he had the glamour and a commanding presence which DEMANDED the audience to look at him. A fine voice too and a guy who was destined to be famous doing whatever he chose. The trouble was (for me) that Freddie was in the wrong band. Controversial thing to say to fans of Queen but of course im merely stating my opinion. I would have loved to see him front a band like AC/DC or Whitesnake. (There was another fantastic frontman - Bon Scott.)
The only redeeming feature of The Beatles was George Harrison. I enjoyed his tune about a weeping guitar (however tacky) and the Travelling Willburys were cool but The Beatles left me cold. How Lennon can be called a great songwriter is beyond me. And that Imagine jingle was the biggest pile of rancid phlegm ever to have seeped from a speaker. Drugged and lost in his own pantomime where he thought himself some kind of guru, Lennon was a man who believed everyone loved him. He saw himself as a walking piece of art and im convinced that as soon as he closed the door on the world and retreated to the privacy of his inner sanctum, he laughed at everyone. Thats right, laughed AT his legions of fans. I don't wish to sound heartless but im glad he's not around today.
But enough on the band members, lets look at their music. The reader will have to excuse me not knowing many titles but ones I do know are 'Help' 'Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds' and im struggling now. One about an octopus in the sea, oh yes and a Yellow Submarine! Its all very tiring and there is nothing fantastically creative there, any teenager given enough acid could come up with it. I think a lot of people believe that because its The Beatles then they MUST love them because surely I can't be the only man alive who think they sound like chimps with xylophones?
Nothing they or Queen have written (apart from the nameless Queen song) have ever shaken my spirit and got my foot tapping merrily along. They're just a boring bunch of acts and I will always be STUNNED at how well they both did. Still as the old saying goes, there is none so queer as folk eh Fred?