Cinderella's Shady Trail

As a gamer now for over three decades...hold on, let me say that again, gamer for over three decades gulp! *reaches for the Botox* It is fair to say that I have played more than my fair share of videogames. Ever since rescuing Xenon princess Roz in Zorgon's Revenge on the Oric 1 inbetween my half hearted attempts at homework, I was addicted (and despite what Daily Mail scribes would have you believe, videogames have never done me any harm).
During that time, I must have spent a gazillion hours shooting zombies, raiding toms and solving bizarre puzzles (cheers Silent Hill). And so its natural that from spending so much time with your pixelated hero/villain, a bond is forged. A bond which makes turning a successful game into an equally successful movie very difficult, and rarely is a director enough of an alchemist to pull it off. Indeed from all the game to film releases, it is only the Resident Evil movies that have held my interest (and even this is because I find them entertaining in their own right and not because they are equal to the cool of the videogames).
So when I heard about The Last of Us movie that is evidently in the works, my little 'ol heart, that heart which has shared many a nervous jump with Joel and Ellie, was not exactly thrilled. And who can blame me? I still shudder when anyone mentions Street Fighter and Kylie Minogue in the same sentence. And less said of Uwe Boll the better.
All the best men know. Even the genius that is Hideo Kojima, who is a major movie fan, will admit deep down to being a tad wary of turning his beloved Metal Gear Solid into a motion picture because he knows like the rest of us know, 9/10 films of games are garbage. Just drop the aforementioned Mr Boll's name into a conversation with Kojima san, you'll get the picture (or not if you happen to be Uwe Boll). Why do you think a MGS movie has not been made yet? Despite being offered multi million deals? Hideo understands man.
Like I said, we gamers forge a special bond with characters over many hours of play, and seeing those "magic moments" reduced to a 2 hour romp ruins it. Take games like Skyrim and Fallout 3 for example. How many hours do we spend in the company of our newly created badass? It wouldn't be an exaggeration to say 200+ hours. You go through many different challenges together, notching up a heroes portion of triumph (and deaths), and all personal to you the gamer. Were someone to come along and turn Skyrim into a fantasy film it would fail, and fail hard because none of your private victories would feature. All those little things you see/hear/feel as you clutch your controller and add up to make a unique overall experience is gone, replaced with a directors vision which so often feels like huge disappointment. No more hero than a bit part player relegated to the side lines, and to be blunt, it f**king SUCKS! Its almost like the movie is invading "our" space. (Similar to books but games go even deeper as they put YOU in the action).
So forgive my failure to get all hard and excited (ooer!) over another game-to-film cash grab, but history shows we videgame fans are always better off sticking with the game. We have too much time invested to see it be reduced a film extra.

Metal Gear Solid the Movie

Snake? Snake? SNAAAAKE !!

Lets kick things off with a quote from Mr Metal Gear Himself:
"Metal Gear Solid was developed specifically to become a game. ...If it were to be made into a movie it would have to be something completely new. I wouldn't use my current scripts. I think I'd have to get somebody to get a new script and somebody else to direct it as a movie."

-Hideo Kojima (March 17, 2012)

Now as a big fan of the Metal Gear Solid games (and after falling out of lve with cinema), I for one would be happy if there was never a movie made of the tactical espionage videogame. "Have you gone mad?" I hear some of you ask. Well no I haven't, at least not madder than usual *chuckles*
To my mind, Metal Gear Solid doesn't need a movie, it does very well standing alone as a game thank you very much. As every game fan knows, turning a popular game into a film is hardly ever a success. From Streetfighter and Kylie Minogue through to the very average (at best) Tomb Raider movie, games very rarely transfer well onto celliuloid. I will concede that the Resident Evil movies are brilliant fun but still, the games rock even more. The difference is huge and to go from 'being' the character in Hitman on Playstation, to then be reduced to mere 'watcher' in the cinema or on dvd can come as a shock, even be frustrating.
Gamers will each have their own different experiences from playing through sections of Metal Gear Solid, we will all have personal victories and defeats but movies are not able to do that. It felt immense to personally battle and eventually beat three Metal Gears in MGS: Sons Of Liberty, but watching some actor do it on a Netflix rent would be quite dull in comparison.
Alas im only another gamer fan and as much as I want the franchise left in this form, time and money will decide if Metal Gear Solid the Movie ever becomes a reality. But if Hideo is smart (and I believe he is), he should be very careful when it comes to making it. I will say this however; as loyal fans of MGS who have bought every game, we certainly deserve more than getting people like the awful Nicholas Cage and Lindsay Lohan involved. Please Kojima san, anything but those two. And this is part of the problem of course, everyone has a different idea on who should play Solid Snake. The character was based on Snake Plissken from John Carpenter's Escape from New York, so logically Kurt Russell would be ideal but Russell is getting on a bit these days and unless Metal Gear Solid the Movie is going to focus on the espionage antics of Pensioner Snake, this rules him out.
Jason Statham sounds about right but when I picture him in my minds eye, dressed in Snake's stealth gear, sneaking through a creaky air vent in an abandoned military site, he doesn't look right. Ditto Colin Farrell. And its not just Solid Snake to be considered, all characters in Metal Gear Solid have been larger than life, the series is famed for it. Liquid Snake, Otagon, Col. Roy Campbell, Meryl. Each of these roles would need filling by actors capable of making those big personalities shine, and I just cannot see a script or studio pulling it off with any success. You can see from The Expendables that having a load of big names on screen at the same time doesn't necessarily mean pure gold. And in Metal Gear Solid its the characters who are the big names and thats not your average big either. Think a brilliantly, colourful, bizarre, mad, over the top kind of big.
To sum up then; making a good Metal Gear Solid movie will need everything clicking into place like a jigsaw dipped in olive oil. This is a much loved franchise and whereas fans might excuse a shoddy Tomb Raider or average Hitman, we wont be so forgiving when it comes to Solid Snake and company. And lets face it, when you look at the jaw dropping trailer below of the new Metal Gear Solid game, well who needs film?


Stunning!