Thursday 11 September 2014

Fishing for Holllywood

Stranger things happen of course, afterall we inhabit a planet filled with miracles and disaster, so it wouldn't surprise me to learn that some sharp suited movie Joe with a fondness for the marching powder buzzed by this old blog of mine from time to time. Hell if nothing else, the hunger of their egos would make this a nailed on certainty. More nailed than a whale God with rare jewels for eyeballs, and bones crafted the calcified souls of super architects but let us get back to earth. Im straying too far from this post.
Can I just say, nay plead with the remains of a quickly greying youth to not be tricked into believing that a reboot/remake of American Ninja, Killer Klowns from Outer Space, They Live and Commando would be good idea. They won't, and you can take that to your overstuffed Century City banks (which if not careful will be remembered for the dosh they made rather than its art). Which would be a shame because while financial reward is itself very nice nothing will dim the glow of producing great work, be it movies, books or music.
Remakes might sound like goof idea, we all remember the glory glory years of the 1980s where it seemed most films were touched by gold but while we know a remake of something like Jaws would be awesome if we were able to capture that creative spark of 1975, we know (with a good del of sadness) that we never will. The most world's most famous shark is born, and attempting a reboot of such an iconic movie would be like mining for gold in a sugar field. Impossible.
Come on, we've seen enough remakes by now to realise that making them is disaster waiting to happen. Move on Hollywood, studios will be making remakes of remakes next (something that would surprise me not in the slightest). Mark my words: movie remakes only serve to dilute the magic of the original.

Here are some personal favourites of mine that ought be left well alone:

American Ninja
They Live
Killer Klowns from Outer Space
Cobra
Point Break
Commando

Mess with these 80s cult classics at thy peril! In fact, better yet, don't mess with them at all. Ever. Lest the ghost of the late Steve James Cpl. Curis Jackson return to karate the movie directors.